Am I Fat ? How To Correctly Answer

Girls cannot refrain themselves from asking this typical question. Often, when addressed to a guy, it’d be a definitive death wish. You answer wrongly, you get a pinch. You answer correct, you get an excessive compulsion(berleter). Either way, you are doomed. So how you do answer correctly?

I’m the type of guy who holds strongly to my stand. “Be honest, no matter how much it’ll hurt”. Although I have to say, this isn’t an admirable logic to hang on to, it does saves me from the trouble of listening to unnecessary nag.You don’t believe me? Ok, I’ll give you some answers I’ve tried.

Girl R: Am I fat?
NoktahHitam: No-lah, ok ok only.
Girl R: Oh really? I was thinking of loosing weight. And you know with all this open house ..bla bla bla.. (I lost her there)

That’s what you get for playing safe, a big fat nag. Seriously girl, if you want to lose weight, bring bottled water to open houses. Excuse yourself from food tasting, it can be addictive.

Girl J: Do you think I’m fat?
NoktahHitam: No. You looked thinner.
Girl J: Really? I’m on this new product call XxX, it helps shave some fat while .. bla bla bla.. I also go to gym .. bla (not interested.. ok?)

That’s what you get for sucking up. I said “thinner” because I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. Turns out, she’s hurting mine by pushing her Multi Level products.

Girl T: Do you think I’m fat?
NoktahHitam: Yes you are.
Girl T: It’s about time I go back to gym. You see, I don’t have time after work .. bla bla .. (please, I’m not your blog)

Being honest hurts too, especially if you don’t know how to deviate the answer.

What you can do is be brutally honest. It’ll likely to stun them, or at least enough for them to change the topic. So how do I answer?

Girl Z: Do you think I’m fat?
NoktahHitam: Of course you are. You look like a cow in tights.
Girl Z: You’re mean!
NoktahHitam: Obviously. Thanks for asking.

Being me, I’m always cruel in my own ways 😯

If you can’t answer, remember your standard 1 class banner, “Silence is Golden” or you can fake an epilepsy, just make sure there aren’t any doctors around (unless cute ones).

ps: I guess it depends on what the girl wants to hear.

pss: Girls, don’t ask boys how you look like, because we use Jessica Alba, Elisha Cuthbert and Marie Digby as our benchmark.

psss: Open houses ends this week! Horray~ I will write why I hate them.

NoktahHitam

I am web developer, who's main concern is to save the trees. Nonetheless

This Post Has 53 Comments

  1. wicked!

  2. kwn aku,pompuan:aku nampak gemok tak?

    aku: tak..besa2 ja..maybe a bit skinny.

    kwn aku,p:ala, aku nk gemok,org kata aku kurus sgt..xsuka. tau tak aku minum whipped cream 30% fat 3 kali sehari..hish. penat ja..

    aku: wow!

  3. Makan la nasi minyak dalam quantity yg sgt byk. Lemak ayam, kambing, lamb sume jgn buang. Makan. confirm gemok.

  4. +plenty of overdosed sleep
    +no exercise whatsoever.

    fat will be piling up in no time.

  5. according to my friend, the recipe of getting fat is simple.

    1. eat anything you want in excessive amount if you can
    2. have sex after you eat
    3. sleep like a baby after sex… 😀

    oh wait…sometimes boys ( read : me) prefer to use local benchmark instead of imported ones like Amy Mastura, Sheila Majid or Linda Rafar. I think it’s more realistic… 😐

  6. it’s very subjective where should one (esp. guys) to answer this kind of question.

    Me myself, never ask a guy whether I’m fat, thin or thinner or whatever.

    For me, as long as they not complaining, I have no reason to shrink or to bloat myself up!

    Haha… simple.

  7. yup. its a killer question. i faced it many times here. especially, when it times for grand dinner or a big event, where they wanted to dress like a queen. phew~

    p.s: i got beaten several times. adoi. hahaha

  8. ami i fat??

    you dun have to answer that..
    cos i know,i’m not fat… 😛

  9. its true…”it depends on what the girl wants to hear”…and most of the time they wanna know is the truth…and whatever nag came out after that is a normal thingy….hey its a girl rite…they always have lotta of things in their mind… 😕

    ps: i wont ask this “am i fat??”thingy to a guy especially…. hehehe…no need to answer coz i know i am… 😛

  10. itu la pompuan. kalu aku menanya adakah aku gemuk, kalu org ckp honest aku lg suka.. sbb aku mmg gemok.. ish.. apa la pompaun nih.. dah kurus nak gemuk, aku yg gemuk ni susah2 nak jd kurus.. bersyukurlah dengan apa yang ada. perbaiki mana yg kurang..

  11. My answer is always the last one…honesty is the best policy…ops and as always they will stone me…

  12. never got this type of question.
    maybe I am not popular among the girls?

  13. yeah same like me here, always get out of the way if i in that situation huhu.

    sometime i do in the ‘kejam’ way eheh. just tobe honest and no longer talk foolish.

    like the way i always use, ‘langgar kemik’ one wakaka.

  14. elisha for me, anytime.

    tolong lah tengok versi omputeh cite my sassy girl. i watched it during the flight back arituh, cair siot with her! she’s even cuter in it than when she was in girl next door imho *drools*

  15. em.. since you are quite thin.. i guess you are lacking a lot in that department.. bro? 😛 the sex part? hahahahaha!

    ps: how to have sex after you eat.. i wonder.. :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

  16. my answer will be : you are F fat.. yes.. MUAHAHAHA! because the nagging from the girl will be the least for this kinda answer.

    yesh! don’t ask us.. we use Jessica Alba, Marie Digby and Elisha Cuthbert as our benchmark.. (in no particular order….) thanks for informing the girls out there bro 😛

    ps: habis lah.. after this the girls sure go say ‘tak malu.. muka tongkang pecah, badan tong dram, ukur baju di badan sendiri lah!’ 🙄 🙄

  17. Aisey.. byk versi eh jwpn.. aku prefer, jwpn no 3..No 4 tu cam sgt gempak je.. Tapi, serious shit, aku xsampai ati nk ckap camtu.. Maaf, aku jugak xkan bg jwpn no1 ngan no2 kalau betul2 dia gemuk..

  18. seriously, i’m fat…!!!
    but never complained to any boys about it because i know that i am fat!!!

  19. watch the korean version, lagi sedih, lagi feel.

  20. thats what you get if you want an honest opinion. hehehe.

  21. have sex after eat? Damn…. cekal.

  22. my sis asks me this question EVERY TIME we meet! wtf. and im not even a guy… 🙄

  23. entah la…ko kena tanya member aku..cari la kt friendster tuh..

  24. No pun intended ok 😮 😯 ➡

  25. Aku pon tak sampai hati ckp mcm tu. Cume ade lah setengah2 awek ni, pantang jumpe aku, mesti tanye. Hello.. I’m not gay ok?

    Agak-agaklah jugak. Kalau die rase die gemok, tade la die tanye. Cume species mengade je suke tanye, bikin panas..

    ps: Slalu awek2 suke tanye lelaki gay mcm2.

  26. tak faham?

  27. am i fat? 😛 haha

    personally.. no matter what answer guys give, typically, girls would want to look thinner 😛

  28. being honest in our way is good, although sometime hurts.but seriously, better than u talking behind,so be honest although it wicked dud!!
    ps: thank god although I eat a lot sometime won’t fat, higher metabolism!!

  29. Eddie, am I fat?! hahaha 😛

  30. some want to look fatter or at least berisi. It’s a serampang 2 mata thingy. Best is just to shut up 😀

  31. no, you’re dead skinny. I couldn’t even draw a stick man as skinny as you 🙂

  32. ceh. even if you want to lie, try to make it a bit realistic!

    anyhooo, I don’t recall asking people I’m fat (atleast, I dont do that often). Instead of asking, I’d say, “shit! I’m so fat I make a hippo look like a stick!”

    haha.

    Eddie, I rasa, the best thing to say is, “no matter how fat you are, you are still my friend” or if that’s ur gf, say, “I will love you no matter what size you are and you look great to me, as always” followed by a smile.

    I don’t think she would nag after that. well, I know I wouldn’t. 🙂

  33. Oh come on Aisyah, in real life, do you think I’ll be this cruel?

    I don’t think I’d share with you what’d I say to my gf (if any) on this open space, jatuh saham nanti. Hahahha

  34. er… you are not that cruel? oh, thats new.

    haha. jk. 😛

  35. ouch..and ouch…..and ouch…

    hey…we got our own benchmark too…. 😀

  36. Ouuh… takut nye.. (gaye mengade2)

    Guys don’t really care how they look like. As long as they’re comfortable, it’s fine.

  37. hehehe..saje aje… 😕

    nice entry anyway~~ 😀

  38. kenapa post kalini i blur2 ayam nak komen apa?
    hahahahaha
    sbb i pon suke tnya soalan cmtu 😛
    and so eddie?
    am i that fat? hihi

  39. Biasanya, mmg perempuan yang xgemuk je selalu tanye..
    Spesis ngada2.. yang sedar dia gemuk, mmg xde lak tnye..

  40. Oops, terasa I… 😳

    At the risk of being perasan, is it a pure coincidence that this post came up after my incessant rambling (in my blog) on trying to gain weight? 😆

  41. haha.. kalau aku.. sebelum dia tanya aku terus cakap “oi pompuan.. ko nampak gemuk la..” gerenti kena pelempang free.. haha..

  42. confirm~

    tapi kalau kene cubit manje, aku nak cakap 10 juta kali 🙄

  43. No no no.

    It must be pure coincidence, else, I would’ve linked to you 😛

  44. Speaking of which, what year was your dad in MCKK? He looks like he’s from the late 70’s.

  45. i never asked people ‘do i look fat’ question. instead, i normally ask ‘do i look skinny?’.coz i wanna look a lil fuller.
    i guess the do-i-look-fatters are just being beauty conscious.maybe guys should try:

    “i think ur glowing”

  46. the question that has all the wrong answers hahaha.. wonder why people are so thin and fat conscious all the time..

  47. Aren’t you good with estimating people’s age? 😆
    He was there 1973-1977.

  48. just smile…thats my style…hehe 😛

  49. hahah. nice one.

  50. Glowing? Good word, but that word can only be addressed to pregnant woman.

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