Step 1.0: Adat Merisik Preparation

In the long list of Malay tradition, there’s one that keeps repeating itself, Malay wedding tradition. Yesterday I went through one of the phase, merisik.

The common question was, should I get a ring? What should I bring? Who else should I invite? What do I need to wear? Answer;

  1. Depends on the girl’s family. Mostly yes.
  2. Something sweet, Ferrero Rocher can never be wrong.
  3. Direct family, father, mother & siblings
  4. Smart casual would suffice.

Anyway, I successfully had mine. Both family seems to be getting along just fine. It turns out, my mom’s cousin was Aisyah’s neighbor. What a small world.

We left home about 2.42 pm. It took dad 25 minutes from Keramat to Sect 7 Shah Alam, no surprise, he’s a speed demon too but generally, I’d say he’s ashamed of being late (it’s a family thing, being on time.)

Now that this is done, I need to buckle up and save for the wedding. Generally I’m happy, but I have to admit, I am freaked out a bit. I mean… I’m getting hitched? Yeah I know, wtf kan? Like all the advises I got, just go with the flow. And so I am.

I guess eventually, I have to shutdown this emo blog as the feeling slowly subsides.

ps: Did you know the gold price is RM 143 per gram? Gile mahal!

pss: Thank you for your wishes 😉

 

There are 47 Comments for “Step 1.0: Adat Merisik Preparation”

wow… now you’ll be a pure men. congratulation and welcome to the confusing world bro. what ever happend after this, SABAR is the most important.

now you have to prepare to do the major thing about the way you’re blogging.

Hias skit la blog ni dengan taman.. hahaha.

P/S: sila jangan tutup blog ni. kalau tak, putus kawan.. hahaha… erk.. bulan puasa ni aper cer?

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Kujie replied #1

kak jie pula yg bertaman-taman rasanya… rasa happy kawan2 kita bahagia

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Kreuger replied #1

same la kak jie… bile ade kawan kita kawin… saya percaya 80% akan membantu kita yang dah kawin menjadi semakin menghargai pasangan kita. pasal tu orang dah kawin suke tengok orang kawin. sebab dia rasa teruja dan tumpang gembira. sebelum ni saya tak paha.. sekarang baru tau…

ape pon.. tahniah untuk eddie. tak ku sabar nak tengok hang naik pelamin beb. haha..

P/S: nanti hang naik pelamin.. aku datang sambil dukung baby. hehehe

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Bab nak cover skit mulut.. em.. nanti kite pikir kan okeh?


NoktahHitam replied #1

Aku ade baru nye site nak launch. hehe :)

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Kreuger replied #1

cepat bro… aku tak sabar. hahaha banyak lagi aku nak berguru dengan hang ni bro. skang ni dok ralit belajar WP API. naik botak rambut aku. nanti kalau hang jumpe aku jangan terkejut plak kalau aku botak. hahaha

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Kreuger wrote on July 25, 2010 #1

seronoknya….pheeewit!
jemputan terakhir tak dapat ikut serta, kali ni kalau jemput nk kena betul2 freekan masa

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Datang jgn tak datang. Kawasan keramat, sure kak jie tau punye. Majlis saye, hujung tahun depan.. kot?

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Kujie wrote on July 25, 2010 #2

Wow!!NH got hitched!!invite saye ye nnt…I love weddings!!

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bul4n wrote on July 25, 2010 #3

it’s sec 8, eddie. not 7. alamat pun tak tahu, gano nih? haha.

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Alamat salah pon takpe, janji tau rumah tang mane :)

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Sweet Thinker replied #1

huuu. biso doh ed kecek key el!

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Kawe dok pehe. Hahaha


Aisyah wrote on July 25, 2010 #4

nice.. gud luck bro..

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kyo_9 wrote on July 25, 2010 #5

congrate bro…haha maju dah skg… moge sampai ke jinjang pelamin..amiiiiinnn

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Makin tue kene la makin maju, takkan mundur plak.

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Roslan wrote on July 25, 2010 #6

sejak akhir2 ni. aku selalu terfikir-fikir pasal mende ni. mimpi pun ade. pergh. siap makan semeja siot. gerun!

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Hmm.. wonder what happened to you. Hahhaa

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xun wrote on July 26, 2010 #7

Well well 😉 Majlis apa end of next year, tunang or dah nikah? Isn’t this a very happy ending, after all! Insya Allah :) Baguslah, anda berdua memang sekufu dan sepadan.

Heartiest congratulations, Ed.

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Thanks zaza! Quite weird though, we were united from our blogs.

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Zaza wrote on July 26, 2010 #8

way to go bro.. orang keramat jgn lupa jmput 😀

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Sure thing! Nanti aku invite all my readers 😉

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Adlan Khalidi wrote on July 26, 2010 #9

Btw, just wanted to contribute a few things.

Merisik, as you said, is mostly adat. Orang dulu risik sebab berkenan kat anak dara orang, but had no virtual contact beforehand. In your case I think wajar sebab Aisyah muda lagi. Tunang pun sebenarnya masa untuk berkenalan, jadi kalau dah kenal sebelum tunang lagi, tempoh bertunang tak perlu lama. My mum & I belajar kat kelas agama, sebenarnya tunang tak perlu dihebahkan setaraf macam nikah sebab bukannya ada apa-apa ikatan yang sah. Tapi tu dah jadi adat orang Melayu. I’m not 100% sure about this since takde bukti, but I think logically untuk menjaga batasan dan elak membazir kot? Org skrg kan banyak guna alasan dah tunang untuk beraksi serupa mcm dah nikah. Wallahu’alam. Sekarang ni banyak guideline agama di-sideline-kan oleh adat. Contoh terdekat, hantaran selalu lebih diagungkan berbanding Mahar. Sedangkan Mahar yang wajib di sisi agama, tetapi hantaran tu lebih kepada adat (dan hormat kepada keluarga mentua).

My two cents, lebihkan keperluan agama ketika bermajlis, supaya perhubungan kita bermula dengan bibit-bibit keluarga sakinah. Insya Allah. I bukan alim ulama’, tapi tak salah kan to share what we have learned/experienced.

Wallahu’alam.

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Bertunang in my humble opinion is similar to “being in relationship” status so that orang lain tak kacau daun. More like dah chop, ini aku punye, so jgn kacau. Nevertheless it shouldn’t be pushed beyond the boundary to an extend of wedded couples.

I do agree on mahar, in fact I emphasized on that more. Because if I had a daughter, I don’t think any amount is enough as hantaran. Therefore, off load it to mahar/ mas kawin.

As far as adat is ascertain, it’s enough for ala-kadar. Tak payah spend byk2 buat mende pelik.

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Zaza wrote on July 26, 2010 #10

woooowww weeeee :) tersenyum senyum org baca ur blog post eddie! yes, go with the flow.

congratulations!

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Thanks nono!

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Nono replied #1

You’re most welcome mister! 😉

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Nono wrote on July 26, 2010 #11

bro…all the best to you..Ajai pon br tunang smalam..sama ngan ko nyer date…aku tak tahu lg..insya allah coming soon kot…

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Owh! Ajai sudah lame, mmg perlu bertunang 😀

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life4hire replied #1

haha…no further comment..ajai dh cukup lama..ko plak cukup pantas

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NoktahHitam replied #1

name pon sprinter :)


life4hire wrote on July 27, 2010 #12

wah! congrats! :)

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akmar wrote on July 27, 2010 #13

omg Eddie, I haven’t visited your blog inna while so I just found out about this.. congratulations you two!!!

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Thank you!!

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waniee wrote on July 27, 2010 #14

congrates bro…hujung tahun depan?adakah sama tarikh dengan aku?ahhahha…

owh..beli cincin sekarang la..dan mari sama2 menabung…aku dah start menabung perabot2..set bilik otw..

congrates again

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Cincin.. hmm tatau nak mcm mane. White gold tade 2nd hand value la. Diamond pon makin murah.

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azam.arshad wrote on July 27, 2010 #15

Congratulation bro!

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maggot wrote on July 27, 2010 #16

Bro,

Congrats..

Dulu masa harga emas RM80 per gram pun dah tersemput aku simpan duit. Sekarang turn ko pulak. Hehe..

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Serabut kepale aku pikir RM140 satu gram. Tak pe la, bare with it, janji niat nak bina masjid.

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Khalid Husni wrote on July 28, 2010 #17

dtg merisik blog ini..hehe

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Fiz wrote on July 30, 2010 #18

My oh my. I used to think that Izrin and you will be the last. Guess that he has to play catch up now hehehe….

Congratulations. Happiness will always be there, for someone who looks for it.

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Sungguh profound, thanks!

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Mind wrote on August 2, 2010 #19

congratz!
selangkah kehadapan ke alam rumah tangga.
mudah-mudahan dipermudahkan.
amin..

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dr.aku.la wrote on August 8, 2010 #20

[…] – malam dinner tu saya juga jumpa Noktahhitam @ Eddie – dia pun dah bertunang 2 Ogos 2010 dan dijangka melangsungkan perkahwinan hujung tahun […]

tahniah NH… jaga tunang bebaik :) hehehehee

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syahirul wrote on August 8, 2010 #22

Oh wow! congrats! aku lambat tau. tapi tak pe, aku igt sabda Rasulullah,

“Rahsiakan pertunangan dan iklankan (maklumkan) tentang perkahwinan”
(Hadith riwayat Ahmad dari Abdullah bin Zubair Radhiyallahu ‘anhu.)

Semoga berjaya menempuh dugaan orang bertunang dan selamat sampai ke jinjang pelamin. Jangan bertunang lama2. Dugaan berat dan BESAR punya. hehe

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mrkay wrote on August 8, 2010 #23

Congratulations to you & Aisyah .. Did not hit me that it’s THE Aisyah, until I read a certain post of hers while bloghopping today to catch up with everybody 😀

Wish you two all the best and may you share your happiness together till the end of time :) Bukan setakat ke anak cucu jer 😀

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melbie wrote on August 19, 2010 #24

Leave a comment, I won't bite ;)

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