The Art of Exaggeration

Girl: I miss my little sister.
NH: Where is she?
Girl: She went for umrah along with the whole family.
NH: When she gets back, ROGOL her.
Girl: WTF?

I don’t deny that most of us (from my secondary school) exaggerate adjectives and nouns. It makes it more dramatic and appealing. Adding more color to emphasize the sentence. Another classic example,

C*LANAT SEDAP GILE ICE CREAM NI!

But then again, some might misinterpret. And by rogol, I mean wrestle. Not stick something in her. I guess it’s only safe to use it among ourselves (among my secondary school mates).

ps: Why do I keep forgetting to write about my badminton racquet?

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I Wanna Go Back Yeah

I’m going back to my alma matter, the place where I spent 5 years singing the same tune every Monday morning. Facing the same one hundred something people. Dealing with the same old teacher. And getting whipped for not wearing a name tag, school badge, tie, socks or black belt. Dining the most disgusting food every day with rice mixed maggots, yellow veggies and smelly over cooked fish.

A place where we don’t get wedgy because couldn’t afford undies. The place where everything moves slowly, including the buses and cabs. And water, that flows slower than an average human pee (at peak hour).

Yes, I’m going back to MCKK, next month.┬áBut I’m broke.

But the best part is, my pay check is guaranteed. Despite being an over achiever, I still get lectured by my superior. I guess he didn’t want me to be complacent.

It’s been 10 years since I left school. Where I am now? Did I get what I day dreamed of every single day? Is this what I always wanted? The answer is, no. But then again, you can’t possibly have everything flowing your way, can you?

Deep down, I am lucky that I was raised in a town called Kuala Kangsar and dealing with crap became my forte.

ps: Nak cendol Kuale~

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Some of Us Die Young, Pondar (1983-2009)

It’s 2am. Something bothers me and I woke up feeling uneasy.

I logged on to facebook and twitter, searching for latest updates from friends and family. *BAM* a news struck me hard. I learned of a friend’s death. Knowing these group of boys, I thought they were playing around, it turns out, it was real. Made a few calls to justify my curious soul. Sadly, the answer will never change no matter how I changed the question.

PondarPondar (Azil Afiq) is not your typical friend. He’s playful and goofy. He lights up the room with his funny stunts and gestures. Loud as he may seem, he is one of those people who’d hide his sadness from others. Pondar is far from selfish, he’d share his grubs during stay ups and would sell his Maggie at reasonable price.

Pondar was a rugby player, he was the hooker, he was my team mate. Though slightly round, he is determined enough to complete 10 laps everyday although at slower pace. Like any other rugby players, his loyalties belong to his team mates. I remembered him sheltering me from being bulldozed by the opponent. He’d ask, “Eddie, kau ok?”. Built tough, sweet inside.

After 5 years at MCKK, I hardly see him. But I knew he was somewhere out there, having the time of his life. Living with no regrets. It saddens me, that our friendship never extended to our kins.

Pondar, I’m sorry if I ever threw nasty words at you. Thank you being a great friend and a wonderful brother. You will be dearly missed.

Note: Pondar was caught in a motorcycle accident and was buried on 20th December 2009, 11 am.

ps: I’d knew I’d feel the pain after writing this down.

pss: To those who’s riding on daily basis, please be extra careful.

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