My Nyayi, My Dear Grand Ma

I am a proud Javanese descendant. My dad was originally a Singaporean, so is my late grand dad and grand ma. “Nya - yee” it’s grand-ma in Javanese (or so I believe), something like nenek, tok or wan.

The story is, she’s staying at my house for the week and it puzzles her, what do I do for living? I’m always upstairs, never wore work attire and wake up late in the afternoon.

To her, modern work can only be in two forms, work for government or in construction business. She could never see beyond that. To make matters worst, she’s illiterate. So it’s always hard convincing a skeptical old woman.

I’ve wrote before how I fooled my tok wan on blogspot, I call that vengeance. This one is totally different.

Nyayi: What do you do for living?
NoktahHitam: I build web.
Nyayi: What is that?
NoktahHitam: It’s something you use on a computer.
Nyayi: What is a computer?
NoktahHitam: It’s like a tv, but you get to do many things with it.
Nyayi: So what do you do for living?

At this point, I’m not sure of how to explain to her anymore. It’s way beyond her comprehension and seriously, no pun intended.

NoktahHitam: I make pictures & I write letters and people pay me.
Nyayi: So the government pays you?
NoktahHitam: Nope. My client, shop owners…
Nyayi: Ohh.. your job must be easy then.
NoktahHitam: I guess so.
Nyayi: Why are you at home?
NoktahHitam: So you won’t be alone in the house.

Nyayi, you’re the sweetest lady in the house, hats off. I love you and missing you already (and that special someone).

ps: Please refrain yourself from mocking my grand ma. I’ll haunt you to death  

Your Miss Malaysia, Levy Li Su Lin

Enough bitching about who sodomized who and I’ve had it with Malaysian politic. I will be writing about it on a lower capacity or shall cease, if my tempted wicked mind permits.

Anyway, let me present to you, Miss Malaysia 2008. Watch the video.

Here’s some excerpts (comments) published at YouTube.

• Yaaake..shut up..disguuusssting
• hey, whats up with the accent??
• Is she a transsexual?
• do you think we are bunch of kindergarten kids?

Frankly speaking, I’d prefer Hannah Tan anytime.

We have a stupido PM, who called bloggers, traitors. And a weird girl for Miss Malaysia both to partake in this ‘thing’ we call globalisation. Still not ashamed you’re Malaysian? She’s your miss Malaysia, not mine.

Note to all Malaysian girls: it’s never about looks, it’s about brains.

ps: Pun intended. So buckle up.

pss: Both of them probably suffer from brain damage.

Hair Cut Day!

credit to addix
It doesn’t matter where I got my hair cut or how much I paid for it, I always ended up rectifying it when I get back home. Today was no different.

My head and face shape is always lenient towards crew cut. Gay gut, spiky cut, pengkid cut, emo cut, short cut, raya card, birthday card, I’ll always revert back to the basic 4-2-1 cut, much easier to maintain and style it afterwards.

I got my hair cut done at the place where I usually did in my yesteryears (12 and below). The fat and friendly barbers and the usual mulut-tada-insurance political talks.

Fat Barber: Long time no see.
NoktahHitam: Yeah, it’s been 13 years.
Fat Barber: Has it been that long? I should’ve retired. What are you doing now?

I explained to him my transition in life, from an engineering student to a web developer.

Fat Barber: How much are you making nowadays?
NoktahHitam: Enough for my tummy I guess.

I slipped out an RM50 note, and the Fat Barber insisted I keep my money.

NoktahHitam: That wasn’t uncalled for!
Fat Barber: It’s nice seeing you around.

I shook his hand and waived my good bye. As I was about to retract my last foot out of the shop, the Fat Barber said, ‘I have a daughter, would you…’

Thank fully it was an air conditioned room, air tight and sound proofed. I pretended I never heard a thing and walked off.

ps: I know that’s rude. Irregardless a female doctor throws herself at me nor a nude striper. But I’m always up for a good company and the flirtatious game. No feelings involved

pss: I think I’m just confused, between reality and fantasy. Between needs and desire. Between love and lust

psss: Arrghhh… I don’t know!

I Think I Like You

I think I like you,
I see you everytime I catch the train. (more…)

My Definition of Sexy

I’ve been meaning to write this a long time ago. Somehow I snucked it at the back of my head. Sexy as derived by your boring dictionary is;

1. concerned predominantly or excessively with sex
2. sexually interesting or exciting
3. excitingly appealing; glamorous

A stereotypical mind defines sexy as partially exposing the ‘fun’ parts. I call that ‘lucah’ or ‘obscene’, not sexy. Full frontal nudity and it’s chronicle is called nude, still not sexy.

Sexy itself is subjective. I wish not to be governed by the above definitions. (more…)

Zarina Ann Julie, Seksi pon Nak Kecoh?

Sorry, you won’t find any pictures of Zarina Ann Julie  here. Unless, you’re good with cache.

In all honesty, why are we making so much fuss?

(more…)

Kantoi on Yahoo Messenger

Long ago, I’ve tried the all-in-one Digsby. Somehow it failed me. Now I’m back to using Yahoo Messenger. I like the emoticons and free VOIP call feature.

It was late, I’m getting stressed with work. I decided to play a few songs before I hit the paper again. It wouldn’t be fun if I were to sing to myself, so I called a girl using Yahoo Voice.

NoktahHitam : Can you hear me?
Girl F typed : Yes. Sorry my mic is broken.
NoktahHitam : It’s alright. Just listen ok?
Girl F typed : What song do you want to play?
NoktahHitam : Lifehouse - You and Me, since I know every single part.
Girl F typed : Ok! Get it on now!

While I was coordinating my jack and electric guitar, an uninvited ringtone was called on to the scene. I looked everywhere, my multiple tabbed Firefox for any unwanted-auto-play mp3, annoying pop up page, even my winamp, non to be found.

NoktahHitam : Did you hear that?
Girl F typed : No.

Ok, it must be the neighbor then. I was just about to strum the first chord, the ringtone filled the air again.

NoktahHitam : You punya phone kan?
Girl F : A’ah. Alamak, kantoi la pulak. Sorry~

I’m not mad, just wondering, why do you hide that sweet voice of yours?

ps : Aisyah si pemalu, err.. err.. eeeerr.. aaa.. aa’ah lah.. ok.. err.

pss : I don’t need anyone to take the blame

psss : I called and sang to 7 girls yesterday, wohoo