The Electrifiying Effect

The other day, eMok wanted to use my toilet, his isn’t working. Apparently, the plug went in the wall.

I pulled my handy tools and showed eMok how to disintegrate the switch. I’m not teaching him the HOW-TOs, just showing the mechanism. Hopefully he’ll grasp a thing or two about industrial design and engineering.

Once I got the plug out, I started explaining the wires and how it functions. (more…)

Bad Habits, If Not Resisted

I sure miss my Internet/Work, it’s been only 2 days.

On Friday, we made a rare visit to my brother’s in laws at Sabak Bernam to see Adriana before she goes back to Kelantan. Carried her in my arms, shook her a few times to wake her up. She opened her eyes, looked at me, and fall back to sleep. If I were a vampire, I’d bite her apple-shaped cheek off.

The road was rather calm, except filled with road hoggers.

The next day, we raced to Johor Baru to see grandma. She’s not eating, hence weak. It’d be helpful to have a doc in the house to re-admit her for glucose drips. I guess the burden is on my shoulder, since both my brothers are taken  

On the way back to KL, I took over the wheel (I did 70% of the driving). Lucky me, dad has a soft spot for luxury fast cars. Driving is more of a pleasure than a chore.

Abah: I didn’t know we can do this fast..
NH: What?
Abah: Look at the meter.

120 miles per hour.

From my rear view mirror, I saw Abah grinned. Two things, he was being sarcastic AND happy with his horse. Slowed down by 20 mph. So JB-KL, 2 hours flat, door to door.

Bad habits, if not resisted, soon becomes necessity.

ps: Solution, take the Kelisa on highway. Surely can’t beat 110kmh with full load.

pss: Celebrating my raya in KL

psss: I miss my younger bro. We usually take turn mocking road hoggers.

pssss: Express bus switches lane suka-hati-ly. F’ You!

psssss: Bad habits are necessities, like coffee.

Doctor In The Rain

So there you are,
Trenched in your white coat,
Waiting by the roadside,
Faithfully waiting for the rain to subside.

So here I am,
A canned coffee in my hand,
Sitting side by side,
Eagerly waiting for the rain to subside.

So there you are,
An umbrella in your hand,
You could easily walk to the taxi stand,
Yet you waited for the sun that’ll never shine.

So here I am,
Walking back and forth,
Pondering my doubts and worries,
When is grandma going to finish?

So there you are,
Looking at the dark grey sky,
Asking the reasons why.

So here I am,
Gasping for every reasons why,
Why the hell am I so shy.

A car came and parked,
She ran and caught her ride,
I squirmed my eyes to improve my sight,
I saw her husband’s inside.

And so I smiled,
Answering my questions why,
I guess it’s one of those days,
One of those unheard Autumn goodbye.

Bye doctor!

ps: Wondering, is this poem season? mating season? cuz everyone seems to be writing one.

pss: I write poem much quicker than a normal post.

psss: Too many open houses to attend. Next will be mine, hopefully.

Petronas Deepavali 2008 Ads

I’m not trying to be KNizam here but this ad brought rain on my sunny day. Watch it!

To all my indian friends and readers, thank you for being a good Malaysian and Happy Deepavali.

To Balajoe, I’m still pretty much in love with this story you wrote 3 years ago. Happy Deepavali to you too. If I was part of the Petronas branding team, I’ll definitely pay you for the story and make advertisement out of it. The only problem is, getting a bas mini.

ps: Yes, I’m a sucker for warm stories and movies.

pss: If one thing Petronas is good at, it’ll be making TV commercials, no offense.

psss: Looking for Junior Web Developer, willing to learn PHP, MySQL and other open source project. Send your resume to wobiboyz(at)yahoo.co.uk. Offer ends on 24th Oct. (MK, this is your ticket to a better oppurtunity)

What Do You Do, Again

It was the first day of Eid-ul fitr, cousins and uncles flooded the house. It was too crowded, I lingered about the surau (it’s 10 meters from the house). Tok X saw me and waved, inviting me to his house.

Tok X: What do you do now?
NoktahHitam: I’m a web developer.
Tok X: Would you care to elabora..
Guest A: Assalamu’alaikum

A bunch of people came. Our conversation was put on hold. Of course I didn’t mind. After 20 minutes, the bunch left.

Tok X: What’s your job?
NoktahHitam: I’m a web developer. I build..
Kids on Lawn: Assalamu’alaikum.. kami nak beraye.

Again, our conversation was interrupted, this time by kids. After handing out the ‘duit raye’, the brats left.

Tok X: What do you do again?
NoktahHitam: I’m a web developer, kind of like a land deve…
Tok X’s Wife: Tok-nye, can you call T, he said he’s coming over.

I guess the neverending human intrusion will never cease during Raya.

Tok X: Sorry you got cut off. What do you do again?
NoktahHitam: I’m a banker at Maybank.
Tok X: Oh, how’s Maybank nowadays?
NoktahHitam: Inferior to other banks in Malaysia, but we have the biggest chain.

A few minutes later, came another bunch. I left and wandered about the surau again, waiting for Asr.

I know our memory is deemed ineffective as we grow old but this bad..? It’s like 10-seconds-Tom in 50 First Dates. OR, my job is incomprehensible for elderly?

Oh well, at least he didn’t pop out the when-are-you-getting-married.

ps: I later whispered to myself what I do for a living, just to fan my ego.

pss: All conversation was in Malay.

psss: Congrats to Khalid on the +ve pregnancy test. I want a baby boy!

Rescue Me Prince Charming?

lambatnye prince charming ku..

Congratulations to my younger bro. Finally engaged to this lovely girl.

Captions (from left to right, top to toe)

1. Ma, nak kawen!
2. Ok, gi beli kain songket.
3. Gi amek tepak sirih dlm store.
4. Jgn lupe withdraw duit sekali.
5. Fiance hang dah tunggu tu!
6. Ok, ok, kami dah sampai.
7. Sat, sat, take picture dulu.
8. Have to negotiate the …price?
9. Dgn ini, hang officially my in-laws-to-be
10. Bling-bling!
11. 100 dulang hati nyamuk… mcm puteri gunung ledang!
12. Pemenang hadiah sagu hati acara muke tak malu.
13. Balik KL balik .. bosan duk dlm kete.
14. Terowong,..! Hold your breath!
15. Oit, bangunlah, dah sampai rumah.

And that concludes our adventure to Alor Gajah.

ps: My first take on wedding photographing  

Family Talk Offends Me

Reminder for NH: When you become a father, you will avoid these one-sided talks.. AT ALL COST!

Talk 1

Mom: When are you getting married?
NH: Relax..
Mom: My friend’s daughter is an architect at Hijaz Architect
NH: … (signalling do I look like I care mom?)
Mom: You want to marry a doctor, it’ll probably take time.

Well mom, it’ my preference to wed a doctor. Don’t shove leftovers (no pun intended) on my plate. I have many ambitions. Let me accomplish them first and we’ll talk about marriage later ok? Besides, how am I supposed to take care of someone if I can’t even manage myself?

Oh and mom, I’m not desperate ok.

Talk 2

Dad: Why not an architect?
NH: Because I’d be jealous day in day out. (I wanted to be become an architect)
Dad: You could do it now. Back then I was so independent. I came home and showed my dad I got a degree in Engineering. (boasting)
NH: … (me making weird faces, dunno, dont want to listen)
Dad: As soon as I completed my final paper, I reported to work the following Monday.

Dad, did you forget that you wanted or rather forced me to undertake engineering. I could’ve retaliate if I wanted to, but I didn’t want to upset you and so I spent 4 years doing something I dislike. I brought home a stupid scroll, which I don’t know which drawer I kept it.

Speak of the devil, so you want to compare your first 25-years of accomplishments to mine? Ok, let’s do the best 7!

1. I wrote my first tender (100% by me) when I was 19 and won the contract. Where were you?
2. I started my professional career at the age of 21, where were you?
3. I ran my own company at the age of 22, where were you?
4. I’ve met so many CEO’s at the age of 24, where were you?
5. I was so good at technical writing, I was hired as a consultant at 24, where were you?
6. I was offered a 5 digit salary as an engineer at the age of 23 (but I declined, I don’t want to be an engineer), where were you?
7. By the age of 23, I secured a total of 20Mil worth of projects, where were you?
8. Optional consideration: And I’m not 25 yet!

So NH, let me remind you, don’t be a jerk and boast like hell. He/She (your kids) could be better than you in every aspect.

Till then, stupid family self promoting talks annoys me.

ps: Ahh.. finally I could take something off my chest, feels good!