• NH and friends NoktahHitam is my alter ego. I am a nocturnal Web Developer at Laman7. Part time innovator, full time procrastinator.

  • “Every one desires to live long, but no one would be old.”- Abraham Lincoln

Am I Fat ? How To Correctly Answer

Girls cannot refrain themselves from asking this typical question. Often, when addressed to a guy, it’d be a definitive death wish. You answer wrongly, you get a pinch. You answer correct, you get an excessive compulsion(berleter). Either way, you are doomed. So how you do answer correctly?

I’m the type of guy who holds strongly to my stand. “Be honest, no matter how much it’ll hurt”. Although I have to say, this isn’t an admirable logic to hang on to, it does saves me from the trouble of listening to unnecessary nag.You don’t believe me? Ok, I’ll give you some answers I’ve tried.

Girl R: Am I fat?
NoktahHitam: No-lah, ok ok only.
Girl R: Oh really? I was thinking of loosing weight. And you know with all this open house ..bla bla bla.. (I lost her there)

That’s what you get for playing safe, a big fat nag. Seriously girl, if you want to lose weight, bring bottled water to open houses. Excuse yourself from food tasting, it can be addictive.

Girl J: Do you think I’m fat?
NoktahHitam: No. You looked thinner.
Girl J: Really? I’m on this new product call XxX, it helps shave some fat while .. bla bla bla.. I also go to gym .. bla (not interested.. ok?)

That’s what you get for sucking up. I said “thinner” because I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. Turns out, she’s hurting mine by pushing her Multi Level products.

Girl T: Do you think I’m fat?
NoktahHitam: Yes you are.
Girl T: It’s about time I go back to gym. You see, I don’t have time after work .. bla bla .. (please, I’m not your blog)

Being honest hurts too, especially if you don’t know how to deviate the answer.

What you can do is be brutally honest. It’ll likely to stun them, or at least enough for them to change the topic. So how do I answer?

Girl Z: Do you think I’m fat?
NoktahHitam: Of course you are. You look like a cow in tights.
Girl Z: You’re mean!
NoktahHitam: Obviously. Thanks for asking.

Being me, I’m always cruel in my own ways :shock:

If you can’t answer, remember your standard 1 class banner, “Silence is Golden” or you can fake an epilepsy, just make sure there aren’t any doctors around (unless cute ones).

ps: I guess it depends on what the girl wants to hear.

pss: Girls, don’t ask boys how you look like, because we use Jessica Alba, Elisha Cuthbert and Marie Digby as our benchmark.

psss: Open houses ends this week! Horray~ I will write why I hate them.

 

There are 53 Comments for “Am I Fat ? How To Correctly Answer”


lyla wrote on October 28, 2008 #1

kwn aku,pompuan:aku nampak gemok tak?

aku: tak..besa2 ja..maybe a bit skinny.

kwn aku,p:ala, aku nk gemok,org kata aku kurus sgt..xsuka. tau tak aku minum whipped cream 30% fat 3 kali sehari..hish. penat ja..

aku: wow!

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Makan la nasi minyak dalam quantity yg sgt byk. Lemak ayam, kambing, lamb sume jgn buang. Makan. confirm gemok.

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kidd replied #1

+plenty of overdosed sleep
+no exercise whatsoever.

fat will be piling up in no time.

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jipo wrote on October 28, 2008 #2

according to my friend, the recipe of getting fat is simple.

1. eat anything you want in excessive amount if you can
2. have sex after you eat
3. sleep like a baby after sex… :grin:

oh wait…sometimes boys ( read : me) prefer to use local benchmark instead of imported ones like Amy Mastura, Sheila Majid or Linda Rafar. I think it’s more realistic… :neutral:

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callister replied #1

ami i fat??

you dun have to answer that..
cos i know,i’m not fat… :razz:

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bongkersz replied #1

em.. since you are quite thin.. i guess you are lacking a lot in that department.. bro? :P the sex part? hahahahaha!

ps: how to have sex after you eat.. i wonder.. :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

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NoktahHitam replied #1

have sex after eat? Damn…. cekal.

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|1f34|-|1r3 replied #1

entah la…ko kena tanya member aku..cari la kt friendster tuh..

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|1f34|-|1r3 wrote on October 28, 2008 #3

it’s very subjective where should one (esp. guys) to answer this kind of question.

Me myself, never ask a guy whether I’m fat, thin or thinner or whatever.

For me, as long as they not complaining, I have no reason to shrink or to bloat myself up!

Haha… simple.

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love-n-hate wrote on October 28, 2008 #4

yup. its a killer question. i faced it many times here. especially, when it times for grand dinner or a big event, where they wanted to dress like a queen. phew~

p.s: i got beaten several times. adoi. hahaha

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abdusfauzi wrote on October 28, 2008 #5

its true…”it depends on what the girl wants to hear”…and most of the time they wanna know is the truth…and whatever nag came out after that is a normal thingy….hey its a girl rite…they always have lotta of things in their mind… :???:

ps: i wont ask this “am i fat??”thingy to a guy especially…. hehehe…no need to answer coz i know i am… :razz:

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yumi wrote on October 28, 2008 #6

itu la pompuan. kalu aku menanya adakah aku gemuk, kalu org ckp honest aku lg suka.. sbb aku mmg gemok.. ish.. apa la pompaun nih.. dah kurus nak gemuk, aku yg gemuk ni susah2 nak jd kurus.. bersyukurlah dengan apa yang ada. perbaiki mana yg kurang..

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smaelz wrote on October 28, 2008 #7

My answer is always the last one…honesty is the best policy…ops and as always they will stone me…

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elvinado wrote on October 28, 2008 #8

never got this type of question.
maybe I am not popular among the girls?

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hilman wrote on October 28, 2008 #9

yeah same like me here, always get out of the way if i in that situation huhu.

sometime i do in the ‘kejam’ way eheh. just tobe honest and no longer talk foolish.

like the way i always use, ‘langgar kemik’ one wakaka.

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megat wrote on October 28, 2008 #10

elisha for me, anytime.

tolong lah tengok versi omputeh cite my sassy girl. i watched it during the flight back arituh, cair siot with her! she’s even cuter in it than when she was in girl next door imho *drools*

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NoktahHitam replied #1

watch the korean version, lagi sedih, lagi feel.

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doyot replied #1

ahahaha..My Sassy girl is way much better in Korean version :grin: ..opss..ok,out of the topic..but IMHO, girl will be girl, sometimes u can’t even understand a single thing they said..But to me,when a girl ask that question is to make sure wether they look good or not..and by knowing that, it somehow gains the self confidence. :grin:

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thebanker wrote on October 28, 2008 #11

my answer will be : you are F fat.. yes.. MUAHAHAHA! because the nagging from the girl will be the least for this kinda answer.

yesh! don’t ask us.. we use Jessica Alba, Marie Digby and Elisha Cuthbert as our benchmark.. (in no particular order….) thanks for informing the girls out there bro :P

ps: habis lah.. after this the girls sure go say ‘tak malu.. muka tongkang pecah, badan tong dram, ukur baju di badan sendiri lah!’ :roll: :roll:

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NoktahHitam replied #1

thats what you get if you want an honest opinion. hehehe.

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bongkersz wrote on October 28, 2008 #12

Aisey.. byk versi eh jwpn.. aku prefer, jwpn no 3..No 4 tu cam sgt gempak je.. Tapi, serious shit, aku xsampai ati nk ckap camtu.. Maaf, aku jugak xkan bg jwpn no1 ngan no2 kalau betul2 dia gemuk..

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Aku pon tak sampai hati ckp mcm tu. Cume ade lah setengah2 awek ni, pantang jumpe aku, mesti tanye. Hello.. I’m not gay ok?

Agak-agaklah jugak. Kalau die rase die gemok, tade la die tanye. Cume species mengade je suke tanye, bikin panas..

ps: Slalu awek2 suke tanye lelaki gay mcm2.

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Mr Am replied #1

Biasanya, mmg perempuan yang xgemuk je selalu tanye..
Spesis ngada2.. yang sedar dia gemuk, mmg xde lak tnye..

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Mr Am wrote on October 28, 2008 #13

seriously, i’m fat…!!!
but never complained to any boys about it because i know that i am fat!!!

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NoktahHitam replied #1

No pun intended ok :eek: :shock: :arrow:

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quiyah replied #1

tak faham?

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quiyah wrote on October 28, 2008 #14

my sis asks me this question EVERY TIME we meet! wtf. and im not even a guy… :roll:

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atreyu strange wrote on October 28, 2008 #15

am i fat? :P haha

personally.. no matter what answer guys give, typically, girls would want to look thinner :P

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NoktahHitam replied #1

some want to look fatter or at least berisi. It’s a serampang 2 mata thingy. Best is just to shut up :grin:

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nuni replied #1

Oops, terasa I… :oops:

At the risk of being perasan, is it a pure coincidence that this post came up after my incessant rambling (in my blog) on trying to gain weight? :lol:

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NoktahHitam replied #1

No no no.

It must be pure coincidence, else, I would’ve linked to you :razz:


NoktahHitam replied #1

Speaking of which, what year was your dad in MCKK? He looks like he’s from the late 70′s.


nuni replied #1

Aren’t you good with estimating people’s age? :lol:
He was there 1973-1977.

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Adila wrote on October 28, 2008 #16

being honest in our way is good, although sometime hurts.but seriously, better than u talking behind,so be honest although it wicked dud!!
ps: thank god although I eat a lot sometime won’t fat, higher metabolism!!

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rodin wrote on October 28, 2008 #17

Eddie, am I fat?! hahaha :razz:

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NoktahHitam replied #1

no, you’re dead skinny. I couldn’t even draw a stick man as skinny as you :smile:

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Aisyah replied #1

ceh. even if you want to lie, try to make it a bit realistic!

anyhooo, I don’t recall asking people I’m fat (atleast, I dont do that often). Instead of asking, I’d say, “shit! I’m so fat I make a hippo look like a stick!”

haha.

Eddie, I rasa, the best thing to say is, “no matter how fat you are, you are still my friend” or if that’s ur gf, say, “I will love you no matter what size you are and you look great to me, as always” followed by a smile.

I don’t think she would nag after that. well, I know I wouldn’t. :smile:

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Oh come on Aisyah, in real life, do you think I’ll be this cruel?

I don’t think I’d share with you what’d I say to my gf (if any) on this open space, jatuh saham nanti. Hahahha


Aisyah replied #1

er… you are not that cruel? oh, thats new.

haha. jk. :razz:

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Aisyah wrote on October 28, 2008 #18

ouch..and ouch…..and ouch…

hey…we got our own benchmark too…. :grin:

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Ouuh… takut nye.. (gaye mengade2)

Guys don’t really care how they look like. As long as they’re comfortable, it’s fine.

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lydiarayyan replied #1

hehehe..saje aje… :???:

nice entry anyway~~ :grin:

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lydiarayyan wrote on October 28, 2008 #19

kenapa post kalini i blur2 ayam nak komen apa?
hahahahaha
sbb i pon suke tnya soalan cmtu :P
and so eddie?
am i that fat? hihi

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sootsprite wrote on October 28, 2008 #20

haha.. kalau aku.. sebelum dia tanya aku terus cakap “oi pompuan.. ko nampak gemuk la..” gerenti kena pelempang free.. haha..

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NoktahHitam replied #1

confirm~

tapi kalau kene cubit manje, aku nak cakap 10 juta kali :roll:

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nikillas wrote on October 28, 2008 #21

i never asked people ‘do i look fat’ question. instead, i normally ask ‘do i look skinny?’.coz i wanna look a lil fuller.
i guess the do-i-look-fatters are just being beauty conscious.maybe guys should try:

“i think ur glowing”

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Aisyah replied #1

hahah. nice one.

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NoktahHitam replied #1

Glowing? Good word, but that word can only be addressed to pregnant woman.

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beep wrote on October 29, 2008 #22

the question that has all the wrong answers hahaha.. wonder why people are so thin and fat conscious all the time..

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ellyda zsazsa wrote on October 29, 2008 #23

just smile…thats my style…hehe :razz:

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ep_jb wrote on October 29, 2008 #24

once upon a time, someone said “u look glowing” yep, because i was so happy dat time.
glowing=berseri=senang hati=mkn bynk.
hehe

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beep wrote on October 30, 2008 #25

[...] Loose Weight! submit_url = “http://www.noktahhitam.com/girls-dont-loose-weight.html”; “Am I fat?” has always been one of the toughest question to answer, and it doesn’t pay if you [...]

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